listening, speaking, anger...and "others"

What is it about being listened to that affirms us?  Being able to speak, and being listened to, affects us all deeply.  Why?

James commands followers of Jesus to be "quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to become angry!" (check it out)  

I don't think these are three separate, unrelated commands.  I believe that they are incredibly interconnected.  

Even among people with whom we typically agree, how many arguments occur, coming out of our own unwillingness to listen to "the other"?  

(Anybody married?  I am...think about the arguments you have with your spouse.)

How much more difficult is it to listen to those we may NOT agree with on big issues.

[Place for paragraph I originally wrote as introduction of topic but moved to later in post...DON'T skip ahead!]

I am still thinking about what Heather had to say last night during her presentation...but there were three things that she shared that I was blown away by, because they were some of the best descriptions of a few biblical truths I have ever heard!  No, she didn't quote scripture, but for these three things, she might as well have!

Let me sum up the three things that struck me:

1) sometimes we try sooo hard.  We expend soooo much energy to find security, happiness, and love.  But it is often when we stop trying that these things are simply given to us...without our "earning" them by our efforts.

2) we often hide our true selves from others.  Especially when we fear rejection for voicing our thoughts, or showing people who we really are, we put up fronts and either practice total avoidance or put on masks.  But when we are just comfortable being our true selves, it's surprising that the world doesn't combust when we come out of hiding!!!

3) related to the last point, we often choose not to converse or relate with people we know we disagree with.  We don't talk to or listen to "others."  But we should!  We should listen to people we know we're going to disagree with about things, and when we do, we might be surprised that there are points of connection; things we might actually, shockingly, share in common.

Here are three corresponding scriptures that I think illustrate these truths:

earning vs. receiving love

hiding vs. speaking truthfully

listening to others vs. being angry at others

I pray that I may believe and practice these things.

Paragraph I was originally going to use to introduce topic:

I was incredibly blessed last night to listen to an outspoken lesbian comedienne from California.  Kenyon had a Speak-Out-Against-Discrimination Day (not to be confused with last week's Speak Out Against Discrimination-Day....just kidding).  Heather Gold was the keynote speaker for the aforementioned day, and I went to hear what she had to say.

Truth will be found...even in the places we least expect it.  

I am not 100% sure about what my response to Prop. 8 should be; it's something I'm still wrestling with.  Frankly, I'm glad I didn't have to vote on it.  But because of listening to Heather, I have a better perspective on where she's coming from.

While I don't agree with her on everything she said, there were those amazing truths that she spoke.  I was blessed by the opportunity to listen to her.  I feel no anger towards her, only compassion (NOT pity, but compassion) and love...

I pray that this honors Jesus who loves and has compassion on "others."

Final thoughts:

I am an "other" to someone...  

I know I want to be listened too...

"Do to others as you would have them do to you.

 If you love those who love you, what credit is that to you? Even 'sinners' love those who love them. And if you do good to those who are good to you, what credit is that to you? Even 'sinners' do that." ~Jesus (per Luke 6:31-33)

Lord, help me to be quick to listen...

hello again! re:Jubilee

So!  This past weekend was Jubilee 2009 at the Westin in Pittsburgh.  It was a fantastic time of personal renewal for me.  The theme for the weekend was the same as the title of my bi-monthly CCO Ministry Newsletter:  Every Square Inch.

Some of the Keynote Speakers included:

Gabe Lyons: co-founder of the Fermi Project and co-author of UNChristian

Bill Strickland:  founder of Manchester Craftsman Guild and winner of MacArthur Fellowship "Genius award."

Leroy Barber:  Presider of Mission Year.

and Lauren Winner:  Prof. at Duke Divinity School and author of several books....

But one of my favorites was Andy Crouch:  author of Culture Making: Recovering Our Creative Calling.

I've started to read his book now, and so far it's really good!  What do you think when you hear "the Culture"?  After only two chapters, this book has helped redefine culture for me. 

During one of the Plenary Sessions, Andy talked about 4 "Postures" the Church has taken toward cultures during the past century (i.e. the 20th Century).  The Postures are to:

Condemn

Critique

Copy

or Consume.

Andy postulates that all of these are reactionary.  They are reactions to a certain "culture."  However, the Cultural Mandate (Gen. 1:26-28, see also 2:15&19) precludes these reactionary postures though sometimes they are appropriate gestures (i.e. we should never be stuck or bent in any of those positions, but sometimes make those temporary motions).  Instead, there are only two appropriate postures for the people of God which leave us free to make the above gestures appropriately:

Cultivating

and

Creating.

Andy says that cultivation is taking what is already good in the world, and passing it along in at least as good of a condition as it was before!

Creating is asking what is missing, and creating what is missing!  This is NOT a blasphemous statement, rather embracing the creative nature which is an aspect of being made in the image and likeness of God: The Creator.  

I'm still mulling over these things, and I'm digging deeper as I continue to read his book.  But I am attempting to seriously ask myself if I am stuck in one of the above problematic postures rather than in one of biblical postures....

Anyhoo...

practically speaking, at the end of the conference, Andy Crouch asked everybody two questions:

1) What one thing do you want to start doing in response to this weekend?  (note: you cannot say "Change the world," that's too broad.  What can you practically start doing.)

2) What one thing do you want to stop doing in response to this weekend? 

I immediately thought of something to the second question.

Kelly and I choose not to have internet in our home, for many reasons, in order to be faithful to Christ.  Some of the reasons include cost, when we get free internet just down the road at Kenyon, and also the distraction it can cause at home instead of focusing on our own family when home, as well as being able to in part "disconnect" while with our family.  Anyhoo...

Because we don't have internet at home, and because I have an iPod touch, and because Kenyon has wifi almost everywhere, I have tried to "spend" my time well by checking email while walking from place to place on campus.  However, in so doing, I have woefully been ignorant of those around me.  The people Jesus informs me are my neighbors!  Leroy Barber, earlier at Jubilee, discussed the need for Christians to be good neighbors.  The Church at times has skipped over the Greatest Commandments to get to the Great Commission.   It is a problem when Christians essentially say, "God loves you and wants to have a relationship with you--that's why Jesus came and died for your sins--but I don't really want to be friends with you.  I don't want to know you, so if you don't agree with me, I'm moving on to the next person."  

THIS SHOULD NOT BE!!!

Wow, anyway, I'm getting pretty long-winded here, but I felt convicted that I was not "neighboring" well.  

Something I've told my students before is that love is not efficient.

While I believe that, I was idolizing the efficiency afforded me by wifi and the iPod touch...and ignoring my neighbors passing by all around me.  I was seeking efficiency rather than love.

Forgive me Father.

So, my response to the second question, is "stop doing email while walking around."

And I've started to notice soooo many things in the short 4 days I've been practicing that!  For one thing, God's creation is soooo beautiful!!!  I had gotten so ingrained and myopic that I was losing the joy of seeing God's goodness all about me!

I'm still not 100% sure what my response is to the first question, but one of the things I've thought about doing is blogging more often!  Just sharing my thoughts, and "thinking out loud" if you will.  So I've finally gotten rid of a few sections of this blog that have not been used, and perhaps I'll add some other sections later.

I hope that you'll join the discussion.  I don't want blogging to become a soapbox, but rather a place of dialogue.   Won't you join me?

Shalom to you!